


Harry Potter and the Diabolical Dance-Off

by pjordha



Category: Dancing with the Stars (US) RPF, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Crossover, Gen, Humor, Screenplay/Script Format
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-29
Updated: 2016-12-29
Packaged: 2018-09-13 03:16:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9104272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pjordha/pseuds/pjordha
Summary: Members of the Wizarding World take part in a very special episode ofDancing with the Stars(US).Set around 2008-2009 seasons of DWTS (between theOrder of the PhoenixandHalf Blood Princefilms.)





	

**Harry Potter and the Diabolical Dance-Off**

By Pjordha

 

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Welcome to _Dancing with the Stars_!

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : And we’re back with a very special edition of _Dancing with the Stars!_   Tonight promises to be entertaining...if not, er, dangerous.

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : That's right, Tom!  I just hope we survive long enough to get some autographs!

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Riiiight.  Ok, head judge Len, what are you hoping to see tonight?

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : Well, as always, I expect to see clean lines, proper holds, and jiggling bottoms.

 

 **BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : YES!

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : And most of all, I want to see proper ballroom and Latin dancing, without gimmicks or props, and please, please, please, can we have no deaths?

 

 **CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : Yeah, no deaths!  It makes it so much harder for us to score!

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Alllll righty, then.

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Dancing the Tango...Harry Potter, and his partner Cheryl Burke.

 

_The band starts playing Britney Spears' "Baby One More Time."_

_Cheryl kicks upward, planting her foot on Harry's shoulder.  He pulls her backward, and promptly falls down, pulling her down with him._

 

 **HARRY** **POTTER** : Sorry, sorry!

 

_On their feet in a jiffy, Harry leads Cheryl awkwardly around the dance floor, stepping on her toes on every other downbeat.  Len can be seen shaking his head miserably, while Bruno dances along in his seat.  At the end of the song, Harry leans down to dip Cheryl over his knee, and just as the last "...baby, one more time!" sounds, he loses his balance, and her skimpy dress rips right down the front.  The audience applauds, sympathetically._

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Well, that was...that sure was something, all right!  How d'ya feel, Harry?

 

 **HARRY** **POTTER** : (adjusting askew glasses) I feel good!  I worked really hard, and I think it shows.  I feel very confident that we'll get at least two 9s!

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Cheryl?

 

 **CHERYL** **BURKE** : (holding her costume closed with 2 fists) He’s a very sweet boy.

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Well, ok.  Len, what did you think?

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : Well, you know, that was dreadful!  You were all over the place, young man!  You lacked rhythm, and your musicality was practically nonexistent.  I really can’t believe such a powerful young wizard could be such a bad dancer.

 

_The audience boos and hisses._

 

 **CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : Now, now.  Harry…you’re just so cute!

 

_Audience “awwws.”_

**CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : But unfortunately, Len is right.  You were just…just.

 

_She makes an exaggerated sad face._

**CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : Don’t quit your day job!

 

_Harry adjusts his glasses and rubs the sweat from his forehead._

**BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : Harry Potter.  What can I say?  You suck!

 

_Audience boos._

**BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : No, no, no!  You can see with your own eyes, he was teeeeeerible!  And worse—you had no chemistry with Cheryl!  How can that be?  Don’t you see how seeeeexy she is?  You’re a young man, Harry!  You should be popping bone—

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Aaaand that’s our cue go to commercial!

 

 **BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : What did I say?

 

{COMMERCIAL}

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Will the judges please reveal your scores.  Carrie Ann Inaba.

 

 **CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : 5!

 

_Audience applauds wildly._

**ANNOUNCER** : Len Goodman.

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : 2

 

_Audience boos._

**ANNOUNCER** : Bruno Tonioli.

 

 **BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : 2!

 

_Audience boos and hisses._

**SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : There you have it, a 9.  Is that the lowest score in _Dancing with the Stars_ history?

 

 **HARRY** **POTTER** : I wouldn’t know.  The Dursley’s don’t allow me to watch much telly.

 

_The audience gasps._

**CHERYL** **BURKE** : I think people should know that Harry has been struggling with an injury all week.

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : Oh!  What kind of injury, Harry?

 

 **HARRY** **POTTER** : My finger.  I split a nail whilst practicing teleportation spells.

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : That would do it.

 

 **CHERYL** **BURKE** : (into camera) Please vote for us!

 

 **HARRY** **POTTER** : (dryly) Yes, yes.  Please do vote for us.  It would make us ever so happy.

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : Could have fooled me.  Oh…am I still on?  Uh, back to you, Tom!

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : I’ve seen better dancing on a—uh…huh, I got nuthin!

 

 **ANNOUNCER** :  Dancing the Paso Doble—Lucius Malfoy and his partner Karina Smirnoff.

 

_Karina comes forward, and then in a puff of smoke Lucius Malfoy appears, his long white hair blowing in a breeze made only for him.  Grabbing Karina in a perfectly tight hold, Malfoy leads her across the floor, staring down the audience and the camera with his intense blue eyes to a booming, powerful version of "Waterloo" by ABBA._

_At the end of the dance, Malfoy flings Karina down to the floor, jumps up and points down with a flourish ending in a booming "Ha!"  Most of the audience squeals, giving a standing ovation.  A pocket of Gryffindor students clap unenthusiastically.  Malfoy pulls Karina up and smugly leads her over to Tom, holding her hand only by 1 finger._

**TOM** **BERGERON** : I guess Death Eaters _can_ dance!

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : In a perfect world—without the disgusting presence of filthy muggles and their degenerate descendants—all wizards would excel at ballroom dance as a requirement before graduating from Hogwarts.

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : I see.

 

 **KARINA** **SMIRNOFF** : The good thing about him is—

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : Woman!  Did I say you could speak?

 

_Up in the stands, Draco Malfoy shouts down "Way to go, Father!"_

**LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : Pffght!

 

_Draco sits down, pouting._

**TOM** **BERGERON** : Uh, let’s hurry this along before someone gets turned into an ottoman!  Len?

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : Well, what can I say?  You had great form, strong Spanish lines, and you gave us that “uuuugh” like a real bullfighter.

 

 **BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : I was scared of him!

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : Exactly.  Well done, lad.

 

_Lucius Malfoy offers the weakest of smiles and even weaker nod of head._

**BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : (gesticulating wildly) You came out there like a wild animal, no?  Your costume, your hair, your eyes!  It was magnificent!  It was—scrumptious!

 

_The audience claps loudly.  Lucius Malfoy sneers at Bruno, who looks like he’s on the verge of salivating._

**CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : Len and Bruno are right, you did great!  Unfortunately...in that second turn you raised Karina just the teensiest bit off the ground, so I'll have to deduct a point for that illegal lift.

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : What?  Why should I be punished because of _this one's_ inability to follow directions?  Absurd!  Outrageous!

 

 **CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : Well, those are the rules, Lucius.

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : (incredulous, reaching into his silver lamé bullfighting costume for his wand) You dare to address me by my Christian name?  Filthy, insolent muggle!

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : As Karina and Lu—I mean, her partner go back to get their scores, why don’t we take a commercial break?

 

_Tom mouths “help me!” into camera._

{COMMERCIAL}

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : Ok, we’re all a little calmer now.  Mr. Malfoy, you seemed a little upset that Carrie Ann took marks off for the lift that you did.

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : I did not “do” a lift, as you Americans say.  I executed everything perfectly.  I have no idea why _this one_ chose to elevate her legs, except that Katrina must be working with Dumbledore’s Army to deliberately sabotage me.

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : You mean _Karina_ , right?

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : Did I stutter?

 

 **KARINA** **SMIRNOFF** : I’m sorry, Mr. Malfoy.  It won’t happen again.

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : Uh…let’s get your scores.

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Will the judges please reveal your scores.  Carrie Ann Inaba.

 

 **CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : 8!

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : Blasted!

 

 **ANNOUNCER** :  Len Goodman.

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : 9!

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Bruno Tonioli.

 

 **BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : 10!

 

_The audience goes wild.  Karina throws her hands up and attempts to hug Lucius, who pulls away, sneering._

**SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : Wow, a 27 out of 30, the highest score we’ve had all night!  What do you think of that, Mr. Malfoy?

 

_Lucius Malfoy stares daggers into the camera._

**LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : I should have expected that you loathsome muggles would resort to treachery.  But I shall have vengeance…when the Dark Lo—nevermind.

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : There you have it, folks.  Great scores, but they still need your votes.  Don’t forget to call the number on your screen!

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : Oh!  I’d like to give a “shout out” to all the Death Eaters…and all the “homies” at the Slytherin Alumni Pub and Muggle Haters Society!

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : Commercial?  Please?

 

{COMMERCIAL}

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Dancing the Rumba—Hermione Granger and her partner Maksim Chmerkovskiy!

 

_To the tune of “Sexual Healing”, Maksim dances across the floor to Hermione, who’s wearing something long and flowing and blue.  She lifts her arms over her bouffant hairdo, and he suddenly spins her, causing her hair to fall in sexy curls over her shoulders and her outfit to spill open to reveal a barely there, two piece thong bikini-like costume.  The audience applauds, but a redheaded young man sitting right off camera makes a high-pitched squeal._

_The sexy dance continues, and the audience applauds when Hermione does a few nearly acrobatic splits.  Everything goes smoothly, until Maksim bends Hermione down for their final, romantic dip, and a bucket of water suddenly appears right over his head, dousing him and causing him to stumble and drop Hermione right on her backside.  The audience groans as if they were witnessing sudden dancus interruptus._

**TOM** **BERGERON** : Wow, that was so great…until—

 

 **MAKSIM** **CHMERKOVSKIY** : I don’t understand it!  Where did that water come from?

 

 **HERMIONE** **GRANGER** : (eyes off camera) Where, indeed!

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : What do the judges think?  Bruno?

 

 **BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : Well, what can I say?  It was seexxxxxx-ahh!  You were like two panthers in the night—stalking each other and then tumbling into a deep crevasse in the desert, only to emerge the next morning covered in love sweat!

 

_As the audience responds, Maksim hugs Hermione from behind, his arms around her bare midriff, pulling her close.  Off camera, another high pitched squeal._

**TOM** **BERGERON** : Ok, Len?

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : Well, you know, it was really very good.  You had good hip action, your musicality was good.  It was just too bad that you ruined it at the end by dropping her on her bum!

 

_The audience boos.  Maksim scowls._

**CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : Yeah, I have to agree with Len.  It was…I just…it was so beautiful.  I almost wanted to cry.

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : Oh no.

 

 **CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : Your extensions were just so graceful and the connection between you was—you totally had me convinced that there’s something going on between you two!

 

_The audience goes “ooooohh!”, but then a red-haired young man sitting up front stomps off, followed by a few screaming ghosts in 19 th century garb._

**TOM** **BERGERON** : My God.  While Hermione and Maks go back to await their scores, I’d like to introduce the hardest working band on TV, Harold Wheeler and the—

 

_The camera cuts to the band, led by Harold Wheeler, but the musicians and backup singers have all been replaced by Dementors.  Harold Wheeler looks on the verge of tears.  The Dementor playing saxophone waves at the camera._

**SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : Ok, Hermione, all the ladies want to know!  How was it doing such a very sexy dance with Maksim?

 

 **HERMIONE** **GRANGER** : It was awfully fun.  Maks is a great teacher—and not just of dance.

 

_“Harlot!” can be heard from somewhere off camera.  Hermione makes a face, then shakes it off.  When Maksim tries to put his arm around her, he suddenly is transformed into the Kool-Aid man._

**MAKSIM** **CHMERKOVSKIY** : What the hell?

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : Scores!  Please!

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Will the judges please reveal your scores.  Carrie Ann Inaba.

 

 **CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : 9!

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Len Goodman.

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : 9!

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Bruno Tonioli.

 

 **BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : 1!

 

_Everyone gasps.  Bruno looks at his card, gasps, and stands up, shaking, his face blood red._

**BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : No, no!  How can this be!  This is not what I….uuuuughhh…must…destroy…Maks…No!  They were beautiful…they were…arrgh…give…10…stop…who put these bugs all over my arms?

 

 **HERMIONE** **GRANGER** : He’s been bewitched!  I’ll kill you, Ron Weasley!

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Where is my agent?

 

 **BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : Help…me!

 

{COMMERCIAL}

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : After a few words with the network and a few more words with Mr. Johnny Walker Red, we’re back!  Coming up next, it’s…it’s…oh, just go!

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Dancing Freestyle—The Dark Lord Voldemort, and his partner, Lacey Schwimmer.

 

_The audience gasps as the lights explode, leaving the auditorium in complete darkness momentarily.  And then, hovering twenty feet above the center of the floor appears…a glowing, blazing Dark Mark!_

**VOLDEMORT** : (off camera) Odious, contemptible muggles—are…you…prepared…to PARTY???

 

_Everyone looks on in shock as the lights come back on to reveal Lacey and The Evil Dark Lord Voldemort standing in the middle of the floor, both wearing matching berets, suspenders, mime makeup, hammer pants, and high top Adidas._

**LEN** **GOODMAN** : (audibly, off camera) Oh my God.

 

 _The band starts playing James Brown’s “Sex Machine.”  Voldemort and Lacey start off with some keen pop-locking moves reminiscent of Rerun on_ What's Happening!! _Then Lacey comes behind the Dark Lord and pulls at his outfit, which is breakaway and reveals his usual long black caftan._

**VOLDEMORT** : (grabbing crotch a la Michael Jackson) Aaargh!

 

_He puffs a huge shot of flames into the air, then hops to the floor for some serious breakdance moves.  The audience goes nuts.  Voldemort spins on his head while Lacey does the Roger Rabbit._

**VOLDEMORT** : Barbarinocus!

 

 _With a wave of his wand, Voldemort changes into a black jacket and pants with pink shirt, and Lacey is instantly transformed into Cha Cha DiGregorio, directly from the 1978 movie_ Grease _._

**AUDIENCE** : Born to hand jive!

 

_The audience jumps to their feet as Voldemort leads the visibly confused Cha Cha around the ballroom as if he were channeling John Travolta’s Zuko._

_Suddenly Voldemort sets Cha Cha into a fast spin, and when the dust settles Lacey appears again.  Voldemort busts out some serious James Brown moves, and then Lucius Malfoy rushes forward with a cape, drapes it on the Dark Lord's slumped shoulders…but the Dark Lord will not be denied.  He tosses the cape away, reaches out for Lacey, and she rushes forward to end the freestyle dance with an amazing, magically-enhanced lift…10 feet off the floor.  The crowd goes wild._

**TOM** **BERGERON** : Wow!  The crowd loves you two!  How did that feel?

 

 **LACEY** **SCHWIMMER** : (trying to catch breath) I can't…heart beating so fast…room is spinning…

 

_Lacey slumps to the floor as Lord Voldemort, now back in his usual black robes, steps over her twitching body to speak into Tom's mic.  He dabs a single bead of sweat from his forehead._

 

 **VOLDEMORT** : Yes, that was quite good.

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Is…is she going to be alright?

 

 **VOLDEMORT** : Do we care?

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Judges!

 

 **CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : Whew hew!  That was amazing!  You had such musicality, and your partnership was fantastic!  Who knew evil dark lords had such rhythm?

 

 **BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : Ah, yes, the original Slytherin Sex Machine!  You really put the "Fiendfyre" in Freestyle!  You can make a horcrux out of me any time!

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : Well, you know, it had fast footwork, lots of content, great moves…you know, I really don't go for all that fancy schmazny pyrotechnics, I just like to see dancing, plain and simple, but young Mr. Riddle—you made a Forgivable Curse out of that Dance!

 

_The audience applauds wildly._

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Great, why don't you head on back to get your scores—

 

 **VOLDEMORT** : No, we shall receive our scores right now.  Some of us have important things to do…after-parties to attend…television hosts to eviscerate.

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : (eyes red with unspilled tears) J-judges?

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Will the judges please reveal your scores.  Carrie Ann Inaba.

 

 **CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : 10!

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Len Goodman.

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : 10!

 

 **ANNOUNCER** : Bruno Tonioli.

 

 **BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : 10!

 

_The audience erupts with wild applause.  Lord Voldemort raises his hands above his head like he's already won.  Those in the audience affiliated with the Order of the Phoenix clap politely._

**TOM** **BERGERON** : Ooookay!  Now that the final scores have been tallied, we'll take a short break while the votes are counted and…and…

 

_Tom notices the Dark Lord's nostril slits flare angrily.  Tom gulps._

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Or…we can just announce the winner right now.

 

 **VOLDEMORT** : Excellent choice, foul sub-creature.

 

_All the couples congregate on the stage.  Harry is holding an ice pack to his knee due to further mishaps backstage.  Hermione stands alone, as Maks-cum-Kool-Aid Man is floating somewhere in the rafters.  Lucius Malfoy stands nervously playing with his hair while his partner tries to stand out of his line of sight.  The Dark Lord Voldemort stands directly next to the mirror ball trophy, hand already outstretched._

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : Head judge Len Goodman—any final words?

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : Well, it's been a great special and I am really pleased with the level of talent we've seen tonight.  I just wish we could have kept the magic at a minimum, but—

 

_The audience boos._

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : What?  Aw, you Yanks can bite me!

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Ok, here's the moment we've all been waiting for—and I think we'll all be relieved when this night is over—and the new Champions of _Dancing with the Stars_ are—

 

_The band plays the familiar clock-sounding drumroll.  Voldemort raises his hand in a condescending wave at the camera._

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : V—(reading the card incredulously)—it's Moaning Myrtle and Derek Hough!

 

_The audience breaks into wild applause as Derek Hough runs onstage with Moaning Myrtle floating behind him.  He happily grabs the mirror ball trophy from a confounded Voldemort while all the other male dancers run onstage and haul him onto their shoulders for victory laps around the stage.  Tom addresses Myrtle._

**TOM** **BERGERON** : Wow, a stunning upset.  Are you surprised that you won, considering you didn't even perform tonight?

 

 **MOANING** **MYRTLE** : Not really.  It's Derek, after all.  He's got quite a nice bottom.  I've visited the _men's lavatory_.

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Oh my.

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : (to Lucius Malfoy) Our producers tell us it was a tight race, and that _you_ actually were the first runner up.  How does that feel?

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : Feel?  I need not feel anything—I _know_ that you filthy muggles are incapable of voting correctly, what with your base intellectual capacity.  You're really all quite disgusting.

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : Ok.  So, do you think you'll join the _Dancing with the Stars in Vegas_ road show?

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : Absolutely.

 

_All the judges and participants join the other dancers on the floor and dance to the theme music as confetti falls from the ceiling.  Tom Bergeron approaches Lord Voldemort carefully._

**TOM** **BERGERON** : Uh…Mr. Dark Lord?  No hard feelings, huh?

 

 **VOLDEMORT** : (slowly taking out his wand) For this most vicious indignity against all that is proper and magical, I shall gladly exterminate each and every last one of you repugnant muggles!  Avada Ke—

 

_Suddenly, Harry Potter comes stumbling through with Cheryl, trying to show everyone how well he's improved in the last hour.  Inexpertly trying to lead and spin his partner, Harry accidently bumps right into the Dark Lord Voldemort, sending him headfirst to the waxed hardwood floor.  Voldemort is knocked out cold.  Harry looks down at him, adjusts his glasses, and shrugs._

 

 **HARRY** **POTTER** : Sorry.

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : You've saved us all, young man!

 

 **BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : Yes, but with no style whatsoever!  C'mon, loosen those hips, Harry!

 

_Bruno demonstrates proper hip action for Harry, who turns red in the face and rushes off camera.  Bruno instead takes up dancing with Nagini, Voldemort's giant snake._

 

 **BRUNO** **TONIOLI** : Now here's someone that understands hip action!

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Oh, my sweet Lord.

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : On that note, I think it's time we say goodnight!  Thanks to all the folks in the Wizarding World for taking part in this very special episode of _Dancing with the Stars_!

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : And for making sure none of us gets eaten!

 

 **SAMANTHA** **HARRIS** : That's always important.

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : You'd think with all their special powers, these folks would be able to dance in hold.  What's wrong with young people today?

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : I couldn't agree more…filthy muggle.

 

 **CARRIE** **ANN** **INABA** : Mr. Malfoy…I find you very attractive.

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : (whipping his white hair in her face).  Eat your heart out, woman.

 

_Just then, Derek dances by with the mirror ball trophy, followed by the other dancers and most of House Gryffindor.  Lucius Malfoy suddenly grabs it from him and falls to the floor in tears, cradling the cheap plastic statue like it was the original Deathly Hallows._

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : Mine!  It's all mine, it's all mine!  I am the dark lord now!  I am all-encompassing poweeeeerrrrrrrrr!!

 

 **DEREK** **HOUGH** : Keep it, dude.  I got six more.

 

 **LUCIUS** **MALFOY** : (sobbing) Wretched mugglefuckkkkkkkkkaaa!

 

 **TOM** **BERGERON** : Goodnight, America.  We'll see you next season…we hope!

 

 **LEN** **GOODMAN** : I wouldn't mind seeing that Tom Riddle fellow dance again.  Sure he was pure evil, but what style!

 

{END}

 

© December 29, 2016 by **KTA**


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